I have been meaning to write this post entry for a while because it’s something that has been playing on my mind for more than a minute. The title is a question I believe even the most confident of individuals will pose from one time or another. Because, let’s face it. Life happens and when it does pile on top of you it has you questioning absolutely everything. And believe me when I say this, questioning yourself and your abilities is by no means an indication that you’re undoubtedly not good enough but instead makes you call into question your ‘self talk’ and the way in which you refer to yourself and how much of your thoughts around this are based on your own negative dialogue.
Let me give you an example. As you may of may not have noticed, I have been pushing a little harder on my blog than usual. A major part of this is down to the fact that I’m at that age and stage in life where I have realised that if I don’t wholeheartedly commit with intention to my career goals and personal life aspirations I won’t achieve my potential. It’s not that I feel I’m too old, but I’m more aware now than ever before that I am no longer the youngest person in the room. Social media has also acted a daily reminder to me that I haven’t got all my s**t together. My finances leave much to be desired, I have battled a number of health issues, it has taken me all of my 20’s to establish what I really want to be doing with my life, I’m not married and don’t have children. For a long time, the fact my life didn’t got to ‘plan’ made me extremely depressed. I spent hours of my day looking back at past mistakes, replaying my failures and wishing I had did things better. I also fell detrimentally down the path of comparing myself to others and devaluing my own human experience. 2015 was the year that my life came tumbling down and since then I have been painstakingly repairing myself brick by brick and for the most part, I’ve battled hard and have risen up victorious.
However, recently I found myself falling down the trap of putting down my achievements in the blog world. I started looking at my numbers and engagement and comparing my content to other peoples. I began to doubt my content because compared to some bloggers sites, I felt that after careful planning of shoots and clothing concepts, redesigning my blog and being more consistent. Other bloggers were getting more comments, engagement and overall more interaction than I was. I couldn’t understand why with all my effort and years of blogging (on and off mind you!) I still was going unnoticed. I noticed many other bloggers who were not blogging for long periods being contacted for sponsored content/collaboration and I wasn’t receiving any. It was really getting me down and for a brief period I began to really wonder whether blogging was for me. I even came down on myself for not being more active on YouTube even though I have time and time again drawn the same conclusion that although I like YouTube, apart from the occasional blog post, blogging is where my passion truly lies.
In order to remove myself from this negative space I had to ask myself the following questions:
- Why am I blogging and for who?
- Am I really giving my readers a true representation of myself? (Whether it be sharing all of my passions and interests)
- What am I driven by? (Money, blogger fame, popularity or simply being passionate about what I do and the content I create.)
- Does it make me happy?
Once I reviewed the above, all uncertainty started to fade away because I was clear in my intentions. I love blogging and I may not be everyone’s cup of tea but I’ve; over the past few months seen my passion and excitement for blogging grow. I love sharing my style, love of food and thoughts with my readers and I may not be a massive blogger with hundreds of thousands of followers but I’m authentic and real and I do my level best to convey that through each post I write. I also really try to pen blog entries on topics that I feel my readers will enjoy. My personal style has more recently taken precedence on my blog as that is the posts that get the highest amount of reads. However, I do realise that these type of posts can become quite ‘samey’ so I will be writing more diverse content over the coming months.
I am without a shadow of a doubt worth it and good enough and I love how my little space on the world wide web is shaping and diversifying. I have plans to add more Wishlist’s, and to bring back #MyMusicMyMood as music is a major part of my life and to be honest, I have missed writing about it on my site. I’m also going to share more beauty tips and even posts on home/office décor. I’m also going to be sharing more ‘writing & blogging’ tips posts as I feel I have learned a great deal from running my online magazine and from blogging that I know my readers will find useful too!.
Comparing yourself to others will not only affect your confidence but it will stop you from reaching your potential. No-one is you, no-one is walking the same path as you and no-one will ever demonstrate your talents and abilities in the way only you can. I am good enough and so are you reading this. Let’s just say, that you need to trust your personal journey and do what you’re doing for the love of it first, everything else will follow.